“Oh wait a minute!

I’d like to propose a toast, to my family.

Someday soon you’re gonna have families of your own, and if you’re lucky, you remember the little moments; like this. That were good.

Cheers.”

Tony Soprano, season 1, episode 13.

“Listen, I know Bertha Jenkins.” said Sirius grimly. “She was at Hogwarts when I was, a few years above your dad and me. And she was an idiot. Very nosy, but no brains, none at all. It’s not a good combination, Harry. I’d say she’d be very easy to lure into a trap.”

Chapter 19 of Harry Potter, Book 4.

“No food for you graduate students, till you grade 3000 papers.”

The Simpsons, where Lisa takes the family and Moe to Vermont.

Ep 6 / S 18.

“I have a test for movies I call the Atomic Bomb test. After I’ve watched about 20 minutes of the film I ask myself, “If an atomic bomb were to go off and destroy everyone in this film, would I care all that much?” If the answer is no, I don’t keep watching the film.”

Robert Prince, from Alaska.

The fact that I wake up every day, and I don’t have to think of any exams, grading, receiving grades, or evaluating someone, makes me smile deeply. I am so glad that era is over.

People who take more exams, or give more exams, die faster, and earlier.

The filling material in my teeth are like Horcruxes in Harry Potter. Each time that any one of them is emptied and fixed, I feel like a Horcrux is destroyed, the Demon is getting weaker, and my existence is getting stronger.

They were filled with the darkest material that an evil could have had.

I am so glad they are seeing better days.

I think Americans are not going to be “real” best country, unless they realize the importance of “a clean and organized workplace”.

Everything is messed up, in small, and large scales.

I think my big issue with my own memories of academia, is that, it traumatizes me. Not that everything went terribly, no.

Lack of support, lack of being understood in the family or relatives, lack of grasp by the society on anything that I did, are some of the examples on how I suffered. My relatives did not have an idea of university, in general. Most of them either did not go to university, or chose a campus close to home. Some, left for the university in other cities, but they were supported hugely by the family members, and they had many cousins and siblings. Like, many. Each cousin checked in once a year, and they had only 200 days to go. The rest was checked in by siblings, nephews, nieces, neighbors, friends, classmates, people of the same town, far relatives, etc. They had hobbies. Life was simpler, and cheaper. They had money to get clothes, food, and have a decent life. Not all, I am talking about people I knew. By my time, there was nothing available. We had to get the family together, and were responsible for everything that was going on inside, and sometimes outside family.

In the past, people really needed only to focus on their own health, projects, and life. As a domestic, or an international student, I had to pay attention to many aspects, including how much I was going to be bullied and shamed by Iranians, in every single step. People think we forget, but we never do.

Not to mention, being treated like an alien. We had to figure out every step ahead, many times a week, month, and a year. It is hard to adjust to a new city nearby. Do you know how hard it is to get along with everything untried in a new continent?

And now imagine, while you do your teaching and research duties, you have to be trapped with people who have no idea of the world outside, have minimal social interactions, and are very proud of themselves for being that way. Their dreams are small, their world is tiny, and their biggest success is that they were able to secure a job as a graduate student / postdoc / assistant / staff / professor, in an enclosed container called academia.

It is too traumatic. That’s why people who have choices, or are on edge and think they can handle it better outside, quit.

And it gets easier. When you work 40 hours as 40 hours, not 10 hours as 80, in a safe, loving, smooth environment, life gets better.

Academics are losers, at lest in Europe, Canada, and in the US. It sucks to be them.

I personally disliked being in a dormitory, when I was an undergrad.

We were 4 people, at least, with 7 people sleeping in our beds. I had to sleep on the ground, because those “takers” were upper class bullies. I was a first-second year undergrad, and they were campus whores, literally and figuratively. I had to adjust myself to them. They stole, stayed up over night, physically hurt me, mentally tortured me, and you know, that age, doesn’t demand many roommates. One, tops. Especially in Iran, where the lack of proper upbringing and education by families is absolutely evident.

My question was, why would people in charge, throw about 150 people in about 13 rooms, give them only one kitchen, with one tiny stove, get them only 1 bathroom, and build floors of these students, unattended? People came to our floor to go to the bathroom, from other floors.

The dormitory I lived after graduation, was worse. We were 4 floors, and we only had one bathroom.

My first year was even worse. We were about 11 floors, and we had one bathroom. There were bathrooms on our floors, but there was no water, at all. There was no elevator, as well.

I don’t think that any normal person would want to stay in such a bloody hell, until you are staying one night a week. Even that, is horrible.

Many of us did not have a decent memory of the past. We were neglected, by our families, by the society, and by the system. We were forgotten. We even didn’t have space to being a friend. People of the center of Iran were usually the ones who felt they are in charge of everything. They considered them our bosses.

Now, why would I want to miss the dormitory? I never miss it. I don’t miss anything about Tehran, or my dormitory. I hated it. I hated both. A polluted city with lots of traffic, unruly, angry, depressed, and rude people.

Honestly, most cities of Iran are like that. People who usually claim dormitory is fun, are the ones who make it hell for others, and are usually the ones who do not stay much there. Many of Iranians were, and are sadistic people. It is hard to live with people who have strong sadistic traits.

Why do you think Iran is falling apart?

The same goes for postdocs as well.

Bart: look at me, I’m a grad student! I’m 30 years old and I made $600 last year!

Marge: Don’t make fun of grad students. They just made a terrible life choice.

The Simpsons, season 16 I guess.