The Golden Globes, the Emmys, and the Oscars used to be global ceremonies. People from all countries were present.

Now they’re just full of a bunch of depressed, talentless, surgically-enhanced Americans showing off their latest procedures to each other. This year, as in recent years, hardly anyone from Europe or the rest of the world was willing to attend — except maybe two or three people.

Frankly, I don’t understand why they were there.